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Do love avoidant exes come back if enough time has passed and they don t feel pressured anymore?
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Do love avoidant exes come back if enough time has passed and they don t feel pressured anymore?
If your avoidant ex responds great, if they don't that's fine too. Just don't make up your mind. They realize the grass isn't so green on the other side. Try new things. And yes, please don't take him back. They start to branch off at stage 3. It’s hard enough to figure out an ex wants to come back, but even harder with so many conflicting signs and mixed signals from fearful avoidants. It's hard to tell if the closeness you feel with an avoidant ex is a friend-connection or a romantic connection. I tell my clients, “Many fearful avoidants themselves don’t even know if they want to come back or will come back”. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. Find out what it takes to bring them back into your life. I prefer to work one-on-one because: 1) no two relationships are the same and 2) what I'm really good at is understanding the unique dynamic between two people and help change the dynamic to where the relationship meets BOTH people's attachment needs and BOTH people feel safe. Going no contact with a fearful-avoidant ex is virtually always the right decision, granted you want them back but they don't want you back. They broke the tie to your relationship for a reason. They have deep fear of abandonment that it's triggered when you don't want them anymore , they chase you then you want them back and they'll run. Most of the time you end up with the person, but still feel insecure because you know they wouldn’t have come back if you hadn’t tricked, manipulated or. Walls are boundaries that are unspoken, rigid and get in the way of proper closeness and intimacy. It’s hard enough to figure out an ex wants to come back, but even harder with so many conflicting signs and mixed signals from fearful avoidants. If you're considering getting back together, the best solution is to sit down with your partner and nail down exactly what went wrong. They might have returned, but they haven't changed. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. The odd heated exchange between exes after a breakup is pretty normal. The odd heated exchange between exes after a breakup is pretty normal. when exes feel their partner was special, unique, or "the one," they are more likely to come back. People don't seem to realise that falling in love is the easy part, but staying in love takes work and is a choice Reply • 1 yr I had a very similar situation that you did. When it comes to choosing antique lamp shade r. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. Another important aspect of dumpers remorse is that it doesn't entail the same. Take your time. Your ex may circle back when the new relationship ends; dismissive avoidants often do because they have a hard time forming strong attachments. Explore the intricate journey of a fearful avoidant ex's potential return. It takes a very long time for these feelings to come back, if they come back at all. The majority of exes with an anxious attachment come back within 0-3 months of the break-up, in the window of time to get them back. No Longer Feeling Threatened: Initially, they might have blocked you to avoid any negative or confrontational interactions. Most of the time you end up with the person, but still feel insecure because you know they wouldn’t have come back if you hadn’t tricked, manipulated or. This emotional suppression is a common. I tell my clients, “Many fearful avoidants themselves don’t even know if they want to come back or will come back”. Keurig machines have become an essential part of many households, providing a quick and convenient way to enjoy a cup of coffee. They both tend to withdraw when pursued, but FAs often do the pursuing when they feel somebody else withdraw. No one knows brother, but focusing on her will cause you pain, so don't do it ;) For clarification, she's avoidant (specifically dismissive). It can do everything from make delicious stews to defrost meats in no time. It's an emotion your ex feels when they break up with you but regret it later. If you have an outdoor shed that has become cluttered and disorganized, it may be time for a thorough clearance. Most of the time you end up with the person, but still feel insecure because you know they wouldn’t have come back if you hadn’t tricked, manipulated or. Once your ex realizes that the rebound relationship isn't. Whether you’re a car enthusiast or a regular vehicle owner, there may come a time when you need to order or install auto body parts. There's a lot to cover here. A Safe Space to Process An Anxious-Avoidant Break-Up. Honesty and transparency are crucial aspects of a healthy relationship, especially when dealing with an avoidant partner. Essentially, the phantom ex is used as a way to perpetually keep the person they are with from ever getting close enough to threaten that independence. I do not have a one-fits-all generic program, method or system for how to get back with your ex. Bury it, keep a stiff upper lip, and move on without truly addressing the impact on our lives. Compared to relationships that have never experienced a breakup, on-again partners tend to report (Dailey et al. Bringing up the past to see your reaction. If in your heart you truly love him and you're wanting everything to work with him then maybe give it a chance. This often stems from mental health problems, negative core beliefs, commitment issues or low self-esteem. My recent ex, has came back once and we've had contact twice It honestly depends on the person. To them it's "harmless" because there is no real intimacy or commitment. This is one of the reasons I point out to people when they ask, “Why is it that just when I start to move on, my ex comes back into the picture and texts me after a year?” In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn’t want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. They realize they made a mistake by. When you have an anxious attachment style and are trying to get back a fearful avoidant ex, the way you might try to reassure a fearful avoidant ex you'll not abandon them is to reach out or texting more frequently, offer to spend more time with them, verbally tell them "I'm here for you" (over and over). This is like you dumped your girlfriend and now push her again for the relationship The idea of romantic relationships appeals to them: They will let you carry them and then berate you for the service. Additionally, it's a good idea, in particular, if interacting with your ex feels draining and frustrating. Now, losing control is a narcissist's worst nightmare and. In my opinion, to answer how a dumper feels when a dumpee moves on, you need to examine the diagrams I've created concerning the 'death wheels'. She's doing this so that you can heal. EquivalentDraft3541 • Avoidant/Dismissive Attachment v they just aren't into you. ATTRACT BACK YOUR EX ATTRACT BACK AN AVOIDANT, ANXIOUS, SECURE EX. So if you'd like to know, "Do they always come back," the answer is no. Discover your purpose and passion in life Don't rush your avoidant ex. PC window updates are essential for maintaining the security and functionality of your computer system. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. So, often you'll see them use this phantom ex as a. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. They may hold on to fantasies about a past lover in a way that makes a past relationship feel somehow. If you are not aware that almost all fearful avoidants do this, you will get very anxious and jump to the most negative outcome, which is, they're pulling away, they're not interested, they don't have any more feelings for you and/or a fearful avoidant ex is. 4. Explore the intricate journey of a fearful avoidant ex's potential return. Coming back is typically a consequence of codependency, emotional turmoil, and the lack of a support system to help them cope. A Safe Space to Process An Anxious-Avoidant Break-Up. If your ex has been sending you rude, angry, or simply incessant messages then, by all means, block their ass. But most fearful avoidants pull away when they don't feel loved and/or the relationship is not doing too well Simply put, an avoidant ex is more likely to want a relationship if you emotionally and behaviourally show that they don't have to worry that being in a relationship with you for example will be too demanding and restricting that they won't have enough "space" in the relationship to be themselves, pursue their own dreams and interests. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. But if you're still declining invitations, skipping the gym, and calling out of work months later, you likely need more time away from your ex Take the quiz. The anxious attacher may feel like ending the relationship was unwarranted. In some cases, exes break up and get back together more than once due to unhealthy relationship patterns or beliefs. thisvid gay fart I tell my clients, “Many fearful avoidants themselves don’t even know if they want to come back or will come back”. If your ex has an anxious attachment style, they might not be over you or the break-up. Today we're going to talk about why exes always seem to come back into the picture right when you've moved on from them and are actually happy. " For someone who constantly feels overwhelmed, saying "no pressure" is likely to be perceived as pressure. It's like "Now that. If your ex-boyfriend recently came back into your life, you might be wondering why. It's their fault because they are not good enough What do you do when an avoidant breaks up with you? 1) Do try to change an avoidant ex's mind. Whether you’re a car enthusiast or a regular vehicle owner, there may come a time when you need to order or install auto body parts. Uncover key signs, understand their unique mindset, and master the art of patience and strategic no-contact in rekindling your relationship. She has 0 friends, and never had a friend all of our relationship. However, doing so often leads to cycles of making up and breaking up. They realize they made a mistake by. You need to act secure to attract back your avoidant ex, but you might not want them anymore. Reactance basically means that we have some inherent behavioral freedoms, and when they are taken away, we try to get them back. They are a lot more comfortable putting you in a box as a phantom ex that they can fawn over from afar. This is one of the reasons I point out to people when they ask, “Why is it that just when I start to move on, my ex comes back into the picture and texts me after a year?” In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn’t want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. Yes, close to 50% of exes do come back. Fast Track Attracting Back Your Ex With Attachment Styles. xnxx cosplay The best way to make your avoidant ex miss you is to focus on yourself. You don't have to start up a relationship again instantly just let him know what you're going through and how you feel. The fact they're reaching out and reaching out frequently when everyone says dismissive avoidant don't reach out to exes ay make you feel like making a dismissive avoidant ex jealous worked to get them back. So contact and text a fearful avoidant ex in connection mode as much as they're contacting and texting you. Apr 11, 2024 · Fearful avoidants usually back out of relationships because they feel overwhelmed, unheard, or distrustful. She's doing this so that you can heal. the offer to reunite is more attractive to exes who feel they have no better option or do not want to be alone. If they're leaning very heavily towards coming back but still not sure if things have changed enough, they'll take their time coming back. U-Haul is a popular choice for many people due to their affordable. Your fearful avoidant ex may even know you love them, miss them and remembers all the good times and how great your connection was, but they still will not come back because they didn't break-up with you because they forgot all the good times, they broke up with you because they don't trust you to be safe, and don't trust that if they. Take the quiz. Without that time, they will feel pressured to generate a response to resolve conflict but don't let time go by without acknowledging what they have done to show up in the relationship. That brings us to the number two reason exes come back after a rebound relationship ends. This is because this is the time when they feel safe to do so. When it comes to maintaining your pressure washer, timely repairs are crucial for keeping your equipment in top-notch condition. Believe it or not the answer to that question is a little bit complicated. Uncover key signs, understand their unique mindset, and master the art of patience and strategic no-contact in rekindling your relationship. stepmom pornvideos Maintain the freedom to be an individual within the relationship and be honest and clear about what you need from your avoidant ex to feel safe and what you don't feel comfortable with Ask what your avoidant ex needs to feel safe and accept that it might not be what you're happy with, but it's what they need to feel safe. If you own a Hoover vacuum cleaner, chances are you rely on it to keep your home clean and free of dust and debris. At first we were fwb but then we developed feelings for eachother and started dating. But if you consistently show up as changed for the better and a fearful avoidant see that they can trust the change in your dynamic will last, a fearful avoidant e will come back sooner than later. Depends. Trust his actions before his words for a sense of security. And unlike fearful avoidants, dismissive avoidants don't get anxious when they don't get a response. And yes, please don't take him back. If you are not aware that almost all fearful avoidants do this, you will get very anxious and jump to the most negative outcome, which is, they're pulling away, they're not interested, they don't have any more feelings for you and/or a fearful avoidant ex is. 4. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. Advertisement Only three percent of mammals (aside from the human species) form "family" relationships like we do. Their curiosity about your life is a tender step towards intertwining your worlds. When you are emotionally reactive to a breakup and you want to get your avoidant ex back, you're probably doing one of the following things: Crying. The fact that your ex still wants you in. If you are not aware that almost all fearful avoidants do this, you will get very anxious and jump to the most negative outcome, which is, they're pulling away, they're not interested, they don't have any more feelings for you and/or a fearful avoidant ex is. 4. Uncover key signs, understand their unique mindset, and master the art of patience and strategic no-contact in rekindling your relationship. Late payments can result in hefty fees and even damage your credit score. If you chose to walk with them again, you would be forced to walk on the same spiked road.
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Probably one of the most prevalent reasons exes come back is because they have no other options, they'd like a little company and they think you're an easy option. This is one of the reasons I point out to people when they ask, “Why is it that just when I start to move on, my ex comes back into the picture and texts me after a year?” In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn’t want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. Urge to get back together with the ex. Dumpers remorse is the residue of love. This is like you dumped your girlfriend and now push her again for the relationship The idea of romantic relationships appeals to them: They will let you carry them and then berate you for the service. An ex who still has feelings for you but ended the relationship because they felt that their needs weren't met in the relationship may keep reaching out but resist or hold. Fearful avoidants usually back out of relationships because they feel overwhelmed, unheard, or distrustful. I was her first to meet her family, live together, etc. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. There's no way to tell unfortunately. So for an avoidant to reach out and say "I need help", they must have had enough and see the point of changing. Explore the intricate journey of a fearful avoidant ex's potential return. Find out what it takes to bring them back into your life. Explore the intricate journey of a fearful avoidant ex's potential return. As frustrating it may be that a dismissive avoidant ex keeps coming back and leaving again, it may actually be an opportunity for you to guide them slowly and carefully towards getting help. Out of the blue, they text or call you. 20 day forecast las vegas strip Renewing your vehicle registration can be a time-consuming and tedious process. 1) They have been harassing you. So when things go south on his end, he is first going to think of you and leech off you for emotional support. Some possible reasons for rekindling the relationship include regretting the break-up, the ex is a better partner, and they were soul mates. For a month or two depending on what stage of the process you are in, don't talk about the past (old relationship) and don't talk about the future (getting back together). 4. Apr 11, 2024 · Fearful avoidants usually back out of relationships because they feel overwhelmed, unheard, or distrustful. Dismissive avoidant In summary, some key points: - Dismissive avoidants may only need 30 days of no contact. My ex (43 m) and I (35 f) dated for 2 years. I'm being generous with he 50-50 chance assuming that your avoidant ex is a big reader and somewhat self-aware but realistically, they may never read it and you will not know if they did. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. She wanted to constantly, yearly she. 1) Do not use their fear of losing you against them. There are signs that some avoidants leave the door open to reconnect and come back, and that the break-up is temporary and not permanent or final. Do you think she would tolerate my doing that. One of the first signs that your partner may be monkey branching is a sudden change in their physical appearance. The fact they're reaching out and reaching out frequently when everyone says dismissive avoidant don't reach out to exes ay make you feel like making a dismissive avoidant ex jealous worked to get them back. Avoidants maintain rigid boundaries to help them feel safe. sucking on huge boobs They could be trying to protect you from getting hurt (by them). People don't seem to realise that falling in love is the easy part, but staying in love takes work and is a choice Reply • 1 yr I had a very similar situation that you did. Others, are so accustomed to rejecting love and care that they instinctively and indiscriminately reject people and relationships without even to really getting to know someone or. In today’s digital age, computers have become an essential part of our lives. A lot of times, your ex will tell you that they don't want this breakup, but they "have to" stick to their decision. Explore the intricate journey of a fearful avoidant ex's potential return. " I don't know how often they come back, but I know they do. By staying friends, they can remain in each other's lives. Understanding what these signs are will help you better reconnect with an avoidant ex. There's no way to tell unfortunately. I feel like the asshole for making that empty threat, but I also feel like it's so unfair he left me the first and only time I wasn't super sensitive to his feelings and catered to his emotional needs over mine (the reason why this never bothered me too much in the past is becaues we rarely ever fought remember). After all, feelings do run high and we're human beings. 3. People don't seem to realise that falling in love is the easy part, but staying in love takes work and is a choice Reply • 1 yr I had a very similar situation that you did. This is one of the reasons I point out to people when they ask, “Why is it that just when I start to move on, my ex comes back into the picture and texts me after a year?” In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn’t want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. Unlike a DA whose relationship fears overshadow their connection needs, FAs equally want and fear connection Strong emotions. Uncover key signs, understand their unique mindset, and master the art of patience and strategic no-contact in rekindling your relationship. That's usually with dismissive avoidant exes. livvy leaks If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. It’s hard enough to figure out an ex wants to come back, but even harder with so many conflicting signs and mixed signals from fearful avoidants. What often happens with an avoidant is that they don’t usually allow themselves to romanticize the past until they see you moving on, or enough time has passed. there's an increased chance of renewal when there's uncertainty over the breakup's meaning or that you had indeed broken up. They realize the grass isn't so green on the other side. Try new things. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. Find out what it takes to bring them back into your life. The odd heated exchange between exes after a breakup is pretty normal. The holiday season is a time for celebration, joy, and spending quality time with loved ones. In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn't want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. This emotional suppression is a common. They see relationships as temporary and unimportant. Some possible reasons for rekindling the relationship include regretting the break-up, the ex is a better partner, and they were soul mates. This is one of the reasons I point out to people when they ask, “Why is it that just when I start to move on, my ex comes back into the picture and texts me after a year?” In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn’t want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. Find out what it takes to bring them back into your life. A check-in is different from a bid for connection. When an avoidant ex wants to be friends, you should keep in mind that your ex doesn't want to slowly work on rebuilding love and trust. Explore the intricate journey of a fearful avoidant ex's potential return. If you chose to walk with them again, you would be forced to walk on the same spiked road. Nov 7, 2023 · What often happens with an avoidant is that they don’t usually allow themselves to romanticize the past until they see you moving on, or enough time has passed. Uncover key signs, understand their unique mindset, and master the art of patience and strategic no-contact in rekindling your relationship. If in your heart you truly love him and you're wanting everything to work with him then maybe give it a chance.
The harder you try, the more an avoidant feels the need to defend and assert their independence by insisting that it's over. So, before you conclude "my ex is an avoidant" (which they may be), look at your own behaviours first. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. Efforts to Communicate: Their efforts to voice their feelings, though hesitant, are precious tokens of trust. If you're considering getting back together, the best solution is to sit down with your partner and nail down exactly what went wrong. If you're considering getting back together, the best solution is to sit down with your partner and nail down exactly what went wrong. 10 EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS. For some avoidants, particularly dismissive avoidants, too much physical touch can feel like an invasion of personal space, triggering another "pull away" response. lollipopginger nude Put yourself first and show him or her what they are missing on. They may fear closeness, but they often seek it in their relationships and after a break-up friendship offers a fearful avoidant the closeness have a hard time finding. Yes, no contact does work with an avoidant ex because it gives them the space to consider what they want and possibly miss you. ATTRACT BACK YOUR EX; MUST-READ; ATTRACT BACK AN AVOIDANT, ANXIOUS, SECURE EX; EMOTIONAL CONNECTION. Are you planning your first backpacking adventure? Embarking on a backpacking trip can be an exhilarating experience, allowing you to explore new places, connect with nature, and c. msmichelle mamii onlyfans He doesn't want to leave or break up with his significant other, but he feels a strong impulse to do so. Yes, no contact does work with an avoidant ex because it gives them the space to consider what they want and possibly miss you. You’ll hear many people say “we just aren’t ‘in love’ with each other anymore. You may think the relationship is dead in the water, but the avoidant is still thinking of you This is what many people hope will happen when they go no contact with a dismissive avoidant ex. Maintain the freedom to be an individual within the relationship and be honest and clear about what you need from your avoidant ex to feel safe and what you don't feel comfortable with Ask what your avoidant ex needs to feel safe and accept that it might not be what you're happy with, but it's what they need to feel safe. A research study showed that narcissists and psychopaths tend to stay friends with their ex for selfish reasons. When dismissive avoidant ex comes back, they look for the safety blanket they know they can get from you — even if it means pushing you away first. pornos babes Attachment issues contribute to problems with self-concept, which in turn can lead to a desire to rekindle. Don't bank on your ex coming back. During this time, babies are fragile and must receive appropriate care to help improve the child’s chances of survival. It is definitely possible for an ex to come back to you after dating someone new but certain conditions need to be present, You have a better chance if your ex is an avoidant. This is one of the reasons I point out to people when they ask, “Why is it that just when I start to move on, my ex comes back into the picture and texts me after a year?” In my experience, often times avoidants end up not coming back not because they didn’t want to but because they felt hurried and made a decision not to come back because they felt pressured. Find out what it takes to bring them back into your life.
If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. Now that you have a better idea of your avoidant ex's mindset, let's get into my four ultimate tips for communicating with them: Become securely attached and determine if you still want them back. Most men actually regret breaking up within the first 24 hours. there's an increased chance of renewal when there's uncertainty over the breakup's meaning or that you had indeed broken up. But like I said, wanting to change is the easy step. Learn tactical empathy. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. Your fearful avoidant ex may even know you love them, miss them and remembers all the good times and how great your connection was, but they still will not come back because they didn't break-up with you because they forgot all the good times, they broke up with you because they don't trust you to be safe, and don't trust that if they. Take the quiz. This, of course, triggers the avoidant person. There are signs that some avoidants leave the door open to reconnect and come back, and that the break-up is temporary and not permanent or final. Additionally, it's a good idea, in particular, if interacting with your ex feels draining and frustrating. Keurig machines have become an essential part of many households, providing a quick and convenient way to enjoy a cup of coffee. Uncover key signs, understand their unique mindset, and master the art of patience and strategic no-contact in rekindling your relationship. While this approach offers potential cost savings on. You don't want to trigger your traumas again. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. Fearful-avoidants are so afraid of someone they love leaving or breaking up with them that they expect it. If an ex comes back, you want to be sure they came back because they want to be with you and not because you were so desperate and tricked them (and yourself) into a relationship with you. dad nxx Photo by Jasmine Carter. Here are some reasons why men come back: 1 The first reason why a man comes back is because he regrets breaking up with you. Apr 11, 2024 · Fearful avoidants usually back out of relationships because they feel overwhelmed, unheard, or distrustful. As if things were not difficult enough for you already, you must know that experts break down avoidant attachment style into two categories: fearful avoidant and dismissive avoidant. You essentially become his safety net - the backup plan so to speak. You’ll hear many people say “we just aren’t ‘in love’ with each other anymore. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. , 2009; Dailey et al. Norwegian CEO talks cruise line sustainability, how to drive loyalty, and why this type of vacation can work for every kind of traveler. Let them come closer as they feel safe to do so. Having an ex not doing breadcrumb is a godsend. Usually, all is forgiven and both parti. You may think the relationship is dead in the water, but the avoidant is still thinking of you This is what many people hope will happen when they go no contact with a dismissive avoidant ex. " I don't know how often they come back, but I know they do. They may fear closeness, but they often seek it in their relationships and after a break-up friendship offers a fearful avoidant the closeness have a hard time finding. nj passenger endorsement fingerprints So if you take away your ex's right to talk to you by ignoring them, they will want to talk to you. However, it’s essential to be aware of common m. However, many users encounter various issues during the update process that. EMPATHY & PERSPECTIVE-TAKING. You obviously still love her and want her back. 6) Avoidant ex hasn't moved on- Avoidants generally move on fast after the break-up, and fearful avoidants within 1- 3 months of the breakup when they lean anxious, but if they're telling you they're not seeing anyone, it's because an avoidant ex wants you to know they haven't moved on fast. You're doing so good. There's never a good time to disagree or take sides, especially when it comes to your loved ones. Find out what it takes to bring them back into your life. Holding onto a friendship allows you to mitigate this fear, offering a security blanket of sorts. Emotional Suppression as a Norm. Avoidants often fall victim to a concept called "the phantom ex You'll know it as "the one that got away That one person that if they could have a "do-over" they'd go back in time and never leave. It will take time to forget about your ex, but getting over your ex will be much easier than fixing your ex's issues for him/her. She has 0 friends, and never had a friend all of our relationship. Going no contact with a fearful-avoidant ex is virtually always the right decision, granted you want them back but they don't want you back. They might believe that things can work out if they just try again "One reason people likely come back is that, the truth is, dating is not as glamorous as they thought, and the grass isn't greener on the other side. When they start to feel as if they are losing their independence they deactivate which often leads to others thinking their behavior is cruel. Attachment issues contribute to problems with self-concept, which in turn can lead to a desire to rekindle. Fear of Commitment and Closeness.